…At the same moment, I experienced exactly the opposite emotion. The tears were at the same time tears of an immense sadness—a sadness at what we’re doing to the earth, sadness about the people whom I had hurt in my life, and sadness too at my own mixed motives and selfishness. I hadn’t known that two such contrary feelings (joy and sadness) could coexist. I was truly experiencing the nondual mind of contemplation.
Richard Rohr, Daily Meditation, Tears of Joy and Sadness, 2025
A “better late than never” post, I knew when I’d read Rohr’s meditation yesterday that it would be good grist for my writing mill, but I’ve been struggling to find the words.
Yesterday, when I’d read another email with the invitation to share a favourite dog poem, I suddenly realized it had been two years to the day (not date) when we’d said our final “good-byes” to Annie. Reading and recalling, at the same time I was hearing Walker the Joy Boy, bounding up the stairs to watch squirrels with a second floor advantage. “His version of screen time“, says Sig, as he can spend hours glued to those floor to ceiling windows.
Bittersweet.
There’s the world close up, across the border, and oceans away…the new e-bike I bought last week…the need to find the perfect buyer for its predecessor, my Danish cruiser…the hail that for two nights shattered blossoms and shredded leaves giving a poor prognosis for some harvests…the rain that finally fell for hours and hours soaking the parched earth…a lingering sadness from my birthday…the delight with my new decade new haircut.
Bittersweet. The co-existence of two contrary feelings.
Still at a loss for this blog, I turned to editing some poems. Trying to track down a reference to one, I opened Breathe, a collection from Lynn Ungar. I know it’s not Friday when I typically post a poem, a photo, and a reflection, but this is it. With better words that I can muster at the moment to acknowledge life’s bitter and its sweet, and unabashed joy that comes from living with dogs – Beckey, Sassy, Torch, Peggy, Lady, Annie, and Walker.
JOY
I don’t need to tell you this world
is hard, and getting harder.
We thought it would be better than this-
more sensible, more neatly worked out,
more righteous, according to our impeccable
analysis of what righteousness should look like.
And yet, here we are. No good pretending
it isn’t both a slog and a crisis,
which is to say, wearing on every last nerve.
And still, when you least expect it,
you find yourself ambushed by Joy, who,
tail whipping and ears slicked back to her head,
launches herself into your lap,
leaving you breathless
and covered in kisses.
Much love and kindest regards, dear friends.
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A Wabi Sabi Life 
Um, I see no photo of the haircut. I’ve never had a dog; I’m kind of sad about that. But I do love the solid presence of my cat next to my legs in bed, or in the chair, and the way she runs ahead when I come into the kitchen and flops and rolls over on the living room carpet for a scratch, making me feel so bad if I don’t oblige, and so I do. xoxo
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That will come…New headshots hopefully this weekend for another new decade new!
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Good morning! Been away camping. Away from the electronic world and immersed in the green world of the lowland Cascade mountains and the beauty of high country snow. I have been immersed in joy—VIvi jumping into my lap (love your last poem)—and reverence. Coming only slowly back into the complexity of the human world of words by reading your words which are always helpful! Thank you, Ann
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Welcome home, or perhaps – given recent world developments – you’re wishing to stay put with your beloveds in the green world? Poetry…gardening…our joy beings…trees…or as Anne Lamott wrote today in the face of it all, and who I quote in tomorrow’s post, “in the smallest moments of taking in beauty…we are saved.” Much love.
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